


Forgive to Forget

by orphan_account



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Childhood Memories, Fluff and Angst, Like, Maybe - Freeform, Other, PTSD, Pain, Reader Insert, Reader is mute, Reader is very ambiguous so, Slow Burn, Slow ass burn, adding tags as I go, blast from the past, domestic abuse, featuring skelesmooches, i always put a warning at the beginning of the chapter in case there are, i tag accordingly, lots of flashbacks, parents are shit parents, physical injury mute, reader is gender-neutral, reader used to sing, there's probably more fluff than angst, they can whisper though, tw, wowzas, you've known sans since you were eight
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-18
Updated: 2016-04-20
Packaged: 2018-06-03 00:41:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 19,709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6589708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You had a monster for a childhood friend once. He was a skeleton stuck down a hole in the mountain, unable to get out. You come back there everyday to play with him, as he was your only friend.<br/>Eventually, all things had to come to an end. You move away, never to see him again.</p><p>And here we are, inside a crowded café that forced you to share tables with strangers because all of them were occupied. You look across your table, and see him.</p><p>He doesn't remember you as much as you thought he would.</p><p>Time to fix that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Odd Child

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first attempt of a Sans/Reader fan fiction, so I'm a little rusty.  
> I'd like to thank my friends for putting up with my crappy drafts. You guys have a special place in my heart.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Reader finally meets Sans in an overcrowding coffee shop.  
> And he doesn't really remember them.
> 
> The odd child who never gave up on him. The odd child who was his only friend. The red smiling face that was taped on the wall in his old room.
> 
> "* it's... you." He mumbles under his breath.

You walk through the front doors of your favorite café, pushing it harder than you usually do. A group of people had been blocking the other side of the glass door the entire time, not giving way for you to squeeze inside. You secretly throw a scowl their way when none of them were looking.

It appears that the place is crowded. _Too_ crowded.

You eventually get through the door with a few exchanges of awkward glances when you almost knocked one of them down, but it's nothing you couldn't handle. It’s 100% their fault.

A mix of monsters and humans occupy the booths, filling the place to the brim with bustling people. This'll give you quite the headache. It would seem like a wasted opportunity to walk out now, because you really could use the coffee.

What you notice, however, is that every table is taken, and you'll be forced to share tables with random strangers for the seventh time you'd been here.

 _Fantastic_ , you thought sarcastically. You'd gotten used to it, to be frank. Even sitting with monsters are okay with you, as long as you get a seat. It appears, however, that one customer isn't.

"You're telling me to share a table with these two freaks?! Are you fucking kidding me?!" A man yelled at one of the workers. You were honestly getting tired of the impending racism that humans always put against the monsters. You've never met a single monster who acted against a human in any way, so what's their problem? The monster hate had died down as of the past three months, but it seems that some people really can’t get over it.

The whole café dips into silence. Dirty and sympathetic looks alike are thrown at the two victims of the yelling man. A worker had approached the offending customer.

"Sir, we do not tolerate any form of bullying-"

"Bullying, my ass! I'm doing half of your customers a favor!" He retorts, cutting the worker off.

"And the other half of our customers want you to leave. So now you can do the entire cafè a favor by leaving the premises and never come back." the worker politely, _more or less_ , kicks him out. Once the commotion was over, everybody goes back to their business like nothing happened. So much for a busy day.

"Dine in - the usual, please. Thank you!" You scribble down a note to hand to the cashier once you're up front, drawing a terrier with its tongue out at the right. There was no purpose for that tiny doodle, but it's the little things that count. You then hand her some bills and loose change to pay for it.

You contemplate on where to sit, because the place seems to be packed. Now that you look at it, the only seat available right now is the one across... huh.

"Hey, dude, I need you to take a seat over there. Knock yourself out," Luke, one of the workers that recognized you as a regular, gestures to the monsters that were being verbally assaulted just a few minutes ago. He was hastily walking back and forth, visibly busy with his job.

"They're nice." Luke finishes, with a look that seems to say " _I'm fond of them and you better be nice, too_ " before making his way to the back room, struggling to serve the sudden increase of customers in the café. It's a Friday, so today's busy business is to be expected.

You don't mind sitting with them. You flash Luke a smile and a thumbs up upon retrieving your order. You'll just have to finish your drink, wind down, then you'll be on your way.

You plan to give the monsters their space, but upon taking a seat, you instantly (and quite unexpectedly) receive a warm welcome from the occupants of the booth.

"HELLO, HUMAN!" the taller monster greets. His voice is loud, but not loud enough to bother the other booths. He's just enthusiastic to meet someone who won't yell in their face upon close contact.

"WE HAVE ANOTHER HUMAN SITTING WITH US AND THEY DIDN'T DO A VIOLENCE!" He whispers at the other monster, albeit failing and just sounded like he was whisper- yelling.

_Whelling?_

_Yellispering?_

"* why don't you go talk to 'em, paps? i bet they're _chilled_ to meet you." the other, shorter monster drawled while raising his cup of iced coffee. You think you hear a rimshot somewhere in the distance before realizing that it was coming from his phone, slyly hidden under the table.

His voice is at a much more reasonable volume, baritone and deep, like one worthy of a radio show. Upon closer observation, you notice that the two monsters are skeletons.

You drop your drink down on a table with a loud 'plop'. You were completely zoned out, staring at them with your mouth slightly parted.

"UH... I THINK I BROKE THE HUMAN! OH NO!!! WHAT SHOULD I DO?! NYOO HOO HOO!!" he wails.

It takes you a few minutes before you get to compose yourself. You push your flashbacks away and flash a smile at the louder one, putting your hands up as if to say "No, no, I'm fine!".

You even do a double thumbs up to prove it to him.You decide that you should try conversing with them.

"I AMVERY GLAD THAT YOU'RE FINE, HUMAN! MAY I ASK FOR YOUR NAME? I AM THE GREAT PAPYRUS! AND THIS IS MY BROTHER... BROTHER? OH MY GOD!! YOU FELL ASLEEP AGAIN! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS..." he’s shooting sentence after sentence, his impossibly loud voice trails off in your head as you stare at the shorter skeleton that looks oddly familiar.

Could it be?

"* a bad first impression? that's im _pasta_ ble." he finally speaks before winking at his brother. He _does_ look like your childhood friend but older, except... he doesn't have the same energetic drive as him.

Maybe they're related? Still, it's a close shot to finally seeing your old friend again. His humour is awfully similar, though.

_Maybe all skeletons like bad jokes and hair-pulling puns._

"SANS!" The taller one- Papyrus, as he calls himself, proceeds to scold his brother for making terrible jokes at such an occasion.

 _Nevermind_.

You're left there laughing at the "TOMFOOLERY" (quoted from Papyrus) of the brothers, mind still racing about your childhood friend.“Are there other skeletons like you?” You write on a piece of tissue and passed it to Papyrus while his brother continued snoozing. He shakes his head.

“JUST US, AS FAR AS I’M CONCERNED. WELL, IF THERE WAS, THEY WON’T BE ANY GREATER THAN PAPYRUS!!!” he boasts. Right.

It had to be one of the two, then.

If not, maybe your therapist was right, all those years ago.  
You shouldn't get your hopes up. You've been looking for him for months, ever since news spread about monsters resurfacing.

Maybe he _was_ just an imaginary friend.

You glance at the shorter one- Sans, sleeping peacefully in his seat. How could he sleep through all of this? The cafè is annoyingly loud and busy, not an ideal place for you to snag a nap.

" _Sans_." you repeat his name in your head. It rings a few bells, maybe you should ask him. You begin shaking him lightly on the shoulder. He wakes up, lazily lifting one of his eyelids. You didn’t question his odd anatomy, having been friends with one like him in the past.

You quickly grab another napkin, and wrote "You look familiar, Sans." on it. You practically chuck it at him. He reads it with deep confusion, brows furrowed. It’s sort of a white lie.

Sans is not just "familiar"; you're convinced that he's who you were looking for, all these months.

He looks at you, then back at the napkin. Then at your pen. Then back at you.

Then it clicks.

...

My bad.  

It did _not_ click.

"* well, you musta' seen me somewhere else." He says, reclining in his seat.

"* bought a hotdog from me?"

You shake your head, groaning inwardly. He doesn’t remember you at all!

"* gone at one of those comedy shows?" You shake your head again, upset.

"* ...gone to art class with a naked skeleton as a figure model?"

"what the fuck" You write on a napkin, passing it to Sans while shaking your head. Being the great brother he is, he makes sure that Paps doesn't read it.

"* uh... gone to grillby's?" Although he doubts you've seen him there, because never in his life had he seen another human like you at Grillby's. He should know, he's there everyday.

You still shake your head, now getting dizzy.

"* well, i do a lot of odd jobs here and there. that must be it." he sounds defeated, running out of things to say.

"HE DOES MANY JOBS BUT HE SLACKS OFF AT ALL OF THEM." Papyrus adds. He says it in a way that tells you he must have said that sentence more than enough times already. You chuckle.

You grab a notebook from your purse, a black leather journal that was as big as your hand. This thing was from back when you were, what? Eight, was it? Yeah. Eight.

"WHAT IS THAT, HUMAN? IS IT A COOKBOOK?" He seems to get excited when he mentions cooking. You silently laugh at his contagious enthusiasm over everything. You shake your head.

"Journal." You write on the same napkin, and showed it to him.

"Very important." you add.

You keep it in your purse all the time, even though you can't really write in it anymore. These held your deepest secrets... and memories from when you were friends with a certain monster. You haven't really opened it in a long time.

You flip to the 4th page, an entry for July 3.

"I'm sure I met Sans before. I wrote about it here." you write, not as sure as you said you were.

"* that's like a decade old." he peeks at it from behind your shoulder. You squeal in surprise, and turn around to swat him away. You read.

  
**_"July 3"_ **

_The day it all started._

**_"Today, i explored the mountain. there was a legend about it, i think. where if you climb the mountain, you can't come back."_ **

_"Long ago, two species ruled over the Earth: HUMANS and MONSTERS." you retell the story in your head. Legend says, that if one climbs Mt. Ebott, you can never return._

**_"it's not like i don't want to come back, though. i just want to see what's in there."_ **

_You had always been quite the curious child, wandering around all sorts of places. But, never have you ever, not once in the 4 years you've lived nearby, thought about trekking through the mountain._

_It thrills you._

**_"i had a plan so i can't get lost going back."_ **

_You've seen this done on television before. You tie the end of a sturdy rope to a tree right at the entrance of the trail, and held on to the rope. This way, you can leave some rope as you go, and follow it later when you want to get home. It's fool proof!_

_You brought a few things with you in case you stumble upon something interesting. Some things to write with in case you want to document it. You also brought an old digital camera you stole from your father. You don't really know how to use it, maybe you could ask him some other time._

_All those things, packed in a worn-out knapsack._

_After hiking for nearly half an hour, you stumble upon something interesting._

**_"i found a hole in the ground, but I was too scared to go down.”_ **

_You drop a rock into the hole, because you can._

_"* ow!" You hear someone say. Sounds like a little boy. Or a grown woman. You were not quite sure._

_Oh._

_Oh dear._

_You freeze, not knowing what to do. Run away? Stay and see what happens?_

_You mean, someone is in a hole. You decide to stay. Maybe they're stuck down there and needs help. Or maybe the legend was true, after all. Imagine that- monsters exist!_

_Your mind was racing, adrenaline through your body._

**_"i met someone who lives in that hole. he told me not to go threw it."_ **

Damn it, you did not spell "through" right.

_"* where did that come from? jeez, might need to patch this up..." they mumble, loud enough to be audible for you. They walk directly underneath the hole you threw the rock into, inspecting what sort of culprit would dare to-_

_They lock eyes with you._

**_"his name is sans."_ **

Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner.

Your gut twists as you read out his name. You ignore everything for a while and continued reading.

_"* uh. hey?"  the odd creature waves at you. He's definitely not human. You also decide that this was a 'he', because you were entirely unsure but that also didn't matter now. A walking, talking skeleton said hi to you._

_Hesitantly, you pull out a piece of paper and wrote "Hello!" with a red smiley face next to it.You pass it to the skeleton by dropping it into the hole. He looks too short to be intimidating, about the same height as you. He catches the note in confusion, still grabbing the pained spot on his skull._

_"* ...cool...? how'd you end up here? oh god, make sure you don't jump through the hole or else we're in big trouble..." he trails off, pacing back and forth before coming to a short realization._

_"* you! you were the one who dropped the rock!" you nod guiltily. "* why?! that really hurt..." he whines, then resumes his pacing underneath you._

_"Was just curious." you write on another piece of paper. Upon reading it, he takes a good look at you, scanning you up and down from what he can see._

_"* guess that answers both questions." he ponders in his spot, "* don't you know what happens when you wander into the mountain?" you nod._

_"* you... you get lost." he lies, not sure about how well you’d take it if you knew how dangerous he is. Maybe, for a change, it would be nice to actually have someone around._

_And it was._

_"I know a way back." you boast at him, crossing your arms._

_"* huh... well then. i'm sans, what's your name?" he hands back the last piece of paper you gave because you can still write on it. This is rather difficult for him to do because he had to quickly grab a chair to be able to reach you, and you had to extend your hand deeper down the hole for some reason._

_You scribble down your name, writing "what are you?" next to it, with no hesitation._

_"* that's a nice name. and, uh... i'm actually a skeleton. for real. you've heard of the legend, right? there are monsters down here in the underground."_

_"How old are you?" you are eager to make friends with Sans. He is entirely different and strange, it beats having boring, mean people as friends._

_**"he's a skeleton who is eight "human" years old like me. he wears normal clothes like a normal person too, which is weird. It's funny, how him looking normal is a weird thing.** _

_**"he says that there's an entire species like him down there called monsters. i thought monsters were supposed to be scary. sans was not."** _

_You ask him to tell you more about the Underground, sitting down at the edge of the hole, legs hanging from it. You can't spend all day standing, anyways._

_He says he doesn't know much about the Underground._

_"* i don't spend my time outside of my room, heheh."_

_You ask him why._

_"* well, sometimes you can see the sky from here. i like that." he tells a white lie. it was true, he enjoyed watching the sky but that was not the reason he doesn’t go outside his room._

_He was trapped there._

**_"monsters are nice, not like the ones in the stories. they place they live in is called the underground. i also had to explain to him why i write instead of talk."_ **

_"* why don't you talk?"_

_You purse your lips together before frowning. Apparently monsters don't know about mute people.You try to doodle it in the best way possible, hoping that it's enough for an explanation.It's just a drawing of you with an "x" over the mouth, then another at the throat._

_"if this happens"  you write at the top right, with an arrow pointing at the throat."then this happens"  you write at the bottom left, with an arrow pointing at the mouth._

_You write "MUTE" at the top to finish it off. You pass it to him._

_"* that's strange, wow.” he struggles for the right words. “* you're..."  Weird. Weak. A freak. Hard to understand. Difficult. Not good enough to be friends with._

_"* new."_

_New. You can settle for new._

_"i had to go home before dark. i told him that we'd meet again. i left the rope as it is so i'd be able to visit him again."_

_"Getting dark. Go home." you write,  underlining everything and drew an arrow pointing towards a red sad face. "Want to come with me?"_

_You don't really know how he would fit in at home, but you wanted him to come with you. You never really had anybody to talk to except for Sans, and it looks like he's the only one who'd bother to spend time with you._

_"* yes." he said to you, but his eyes looked sad and miserable. Another thing you noticed with him is that he never stopped smiling. You didn't ask about it, because it didn't really bother you. Maybe all skeletons do that, having nothing but teeth._

_But you can easily tell when he's upset- his eyes give it away._

_"* i want to come with you. but... i can't. there's a barrier between the underground and the surface, only a human can come in." he paused, carefully wording the next sentence to make it clear to you._

_"* ...but no one can get out." that wasn't as accurate as he wanted it to be, but he'd explain more later on when you come back tomorrow._

_You frown, clearly disappointed. But, you are determined enough not to let this barrier get in the way of your friendship._

_Not now, not ever._

_"* come back tomorrow." He suggests, and you nod enthusiastically."See you!" You write as a final goodbye, dropping it down the hole before running back home._

_You follow the rope, leaving it as it is so you can find a way back to Sans. You were looking forward to tomorrow._

**_“i had fun with sans, who is now my new friend. i told him that i’ll come back tomorrow.”_ **

You snap back to reality.

You couldn’t believe it.

It is him. You found him. You found Sans!

"* his name is sans... skeleton... normal clothes..." someone murmurs from behind. Sans had been skimming over the page from over your shoulder. You quickly shut the book and playfully smack his arm.

His eyes grow wide as he scans your face, as surprised as you are.

He... doesn't remember much.

Long after you stopped visiting, he eventually forgot about you. Something seemed to be blocking his memories, not being able to recall those good years. But, at a leisurely pace, he starts to remember a little as he spends the next few minutes gawking at you.

You, the odd child from the surface. The odd child who brought him hotdogs. The odd child who couldn’t talk. The odd child who showed him how to draw.

The odd child who never gave up on him. The odd child who was his only friend. The red smiling face that was taped on the wall in his old room.

"* it's... you." He mumbles under his breath. He takes a quick glance at Papyrus, who's completely clueless as to what's going on."* it really is you."

The odd child.


	2. Had Gone Missing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which you have a friendly little date in Muffet's Bakery.  
> And Sans' god-awful puns.
> 
> Realizing that you finished the cupcake, you get lost in thought as you stare at the empty plate.
> 
> "* don't worry about it, it's on the house." He dabbed the leftover icing on his finger and smudged it on your cheek.
> 
> "* no, wait, it's on you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters on the first day? I'm impatient.

"* it's... you." he mumbles under his breath. He takes a quick glance at Papyrus, who's completely clueless as to what's going on.

"* it really is you." he mutters in disbelief.

"SO... YOU TWO KNEW EACH OTHER? WOWIE!" He pauses rather awkwardly. You can tell that he feels a great discomfort in intruding you two. You want to tell him that it’s okay, but it’s too late as he continues his speech.

"THE GREAT PAPYRUS WOULD LIKE TO GIVE YOU TWO SOME SPACE SO YOU CAN CATCH UP WITH EACH OTHER. I HEAR IT'S WHAT OLD FRIENDS DO! GOODBYE, BROTHER, I'LL BE OUTSIDE." He stands up, flashing a heroic pose before adjusting his scarf. He twirls on his way outside, laughing with a loud, “NYEH HEH HEH!”.

This boy.

"I have to go, too" is written on yet another napkin and handed to Sans. As much as you'd love to stay and catch up with him, you _did_ just waltz in here to grab a cup of coffee.

"* awww, not you too," Sans mockingly pouted.”* c’mon don’t do this,”

Once Papyrus is outside of the café, you begin to stuff your journal back in your purse, having a very hard time doing so.

"* wait hold on, we should mee-"

 _Shit_.

Your journal slips from your hands, pieces of paper flying out from in between the pages.

 _Shit, shit, shit_.

You quickly pick up the journal, not minding the interrogating stares from other customers. You also pick up the pieces of paper that flew out, all but one. One of which Sans already picked up for you.

It was a drawing you two drew together from the third time you visit him at the mountain.

A red smiling face drawn by you at the left, and a blue one drawn by Sans at the right. Sans stared at it with a distant look on his face, slowly recollecting his memories. The longer he looks at your writings and drawings, the more he remembers.

"* here..." he gives it back to you, but you pushed his hand away.”Keep it," you mouth at him.

"* oh, uh, thanks? tibia honest," you snort, "* i... don't remember much of... you. or that hole that i lived in. or the time you went to my place at the mountain," he admits, looking guiltily at you. No shit.

You tell him to follow you outside, because the café was getting more and more crowded by the minute. You turn around and leave through the door, feeling strangely exhausted by the unexpected encounter.

Papyrus is at the side, staring at the ground. Once he spots you walk out the door next to him, he quickly shows you a grin.

"* as i was saying, let's meet again, yeah?" You hear someone say from behind you. You jump, not really expecting him to just show up all of a sudden. _Quit doing that, jeez._

"* spider bakery is just across the street, 10 am. i'll be there."

You could feel a little bit of excitement in his voice, like he couldn't wait. You nod, thrilled to finally get the chance to be friends with him again. It feels like re-watching a TV show you watched as a kid.

"* see ya tomorrow." He waves, walking in the opposite direction you were about to head. "* c'mon papyrus," he ushers.

You walk back home, completely forgetting the drink still sitting on the table, untouched.

* * *

 

You walk into the bakery, as Sans had instructed yesterday. Muffet’s Bakery was run by a monster named Muffet (duh), a spider-themed café that includes the best pastries anyone could offer in this region, and it appears that there only a few customers inside.

Relief washes over you as you realize that you no longer have to worry about the café crowding, as opposed to the one you regularly visit.

You immediately spot Sans picking at his cupcake at a corner booth. Your eyes meet and you feel your face split into a grin. You walk towards the table after giving a small wave.

"* hey, cupcake." He shoves his plate of cupcake in front your face as you roll your eyes. You sit next to him, huffing in annoyance. _Don’t you dare_ , the look on your face read. He only seems to smile wider, preparing another joke.

"* bought ya flours. heard that's what you give women on special occasions." You laugh, exhaling through your throat to let out a silent, raspy giggle. You facepalm in mock-exasperation, hearing something being pushed towards you on the table.

It was a bag of flour. _God damn it, Sans_.

"You never changed >:0 that was horrible!!" you write on a napkin with the pen that's always clipped to your collar, driving it against his chest.

"* aww, but everybody loves those." You stick your tongue out at him. Very childish, yes; you never did quite lose the playful nature you possessed when you were a child. Same goes for Sans, it seems.

It was true, you love the bad jokes he would tell you, even back when you would visit that strange hole in the ground.

Speaking of which, you ask Sans why he moved here, thinking that it has been the luckiest coincidence that he did.

"* i dunno. felt strongly about it. just moved in here a couple a'days ago. seems like my non-existent guts did me justice." he shrugs, batting his left eye at the last sentence. There’s a certain glint in his eyes that warmed you.

"* you know, i've always wondered what happened to you after all those years." this time, it’s your turn to shrug.

"Got sent to therapy after moving away. They thought I was crazy when I talked about you." you write. "Imaginary friends, they call it."

"* wow. musta' been tough.", he says. He looks at you while you furrow your eyebrows at unwanted memories. You then continue writing.

"How long has it been?"

"* not sure. time runs differently underground than it does up here." You nod in understanding.

The conversation awkwardly dies down, the both of you reducing to silence. You feel him shift beside you, hesitating to ask a question.

"* you... stopped visiting, never really told me why." You bite you lip, hearing betrayal tainting his voice.

"Got caught wandering through the mountain. They made us move away." you write. You figure that you do owe him an explanation, after all that. You never gave a proper goodbye; you just disappeared.

It was probably for the best.

"* would be lying if i said i didn't miss you." he whispered to himself, You tried not to blush, concentrating on staring at the cupcake. "* oh hey, you want some? i don't have the _stomach_ for it."

You let out another mute laugh. You never felt comfortable when you do it, but you feel so comfortable with Sans, you don't even notice. His eyes glow brighter when you do, anyways.

You take the plate and the untouched fork, nibbling your way through the cupcake.

"Ever since the barrier broke, I moved to every single city around the mountain and talked to every monster I could find."

"* huh. why?"

"I was looking for you." You looked down after handing the napkin to Sans. He looked at it in confusion, so you decided to continue writing.

"I... kept a promise." You grabbed your journal from the bag and began flipping through it. Your fingers run over the page that you wrote on the day when Sans's father had talked to you when you came for a visit one day.

Sans shifts his way beside you, looking at what was written.

"* i need to freshen up my memories, too, y'know?" he smiled sheepishly, before reading with you.

  
_**"August 15"**_

_It was a month after you two met._

_**"Sans wasn't there when i visited.i brought more of the ketchup that he liked, as well as more color markers for us to draw with."** _

_You stop in your tracks when you recognize the hole in the ground. A few days ago, Sans had boarded up the hole with a piece of wood to avoid anybody else from stumbling upon it._

_You knock in the rhythm that you and him agreed on, sort of like a password so Sans would know it was you._

_Knock knock knock, knockknockknock - knock knock knock, knock knock._

_It takes longer than a minute until the board finally shifted out of the way. You go pale, seeing that this is not Sans._

_"It's you."  A man remarks nonchalantly, looking up at you._

_You freeze. It's Gaster, Sans' father, much to your surprise._

_"I'm here to apologize for last time."_

_**"Mister gaster (dad of sans i think) was there, i don't know where sans is. he said sorry for the last time we met. i'm okay with it. he also wanted to talk about other things. "** _

_"Sans, is... He's not like any other monster who lives here. Just to warn you."_

_You don't reply. He's intimidating, to say the least._

_He was dressed in a casual turtleneck and slacks, glasses propped up his tired eyes._

_A crack went up from his right eye. It wasn't there before.The silence that breaks out into the uneasy atmosphere was quite awkward. He seems to hesitate before continuing._

_"Look, I want you to do me a favor." Okay, now that caught your attention. You take the piece of paper you carried with you on the way here, and the pencil that you stole from your mother's drawer.You steal a lot of things from your parents._

_"?" you write on it, dropping it to Gaster. He told you that you were an odd human, with the way you talk._

_**"He thinks i'm weird. don't blame him, a lot of people do. i think most monsters don't know that some people can't talk."** _

_"When we get out of here, a-and we will get out of here! Just... no matter where you are, when the barrier breaks, I want you to look for Sans. Can you do that for me?"_

_**"He wants me to find sans after the barrier is gone. i don't know when that will happen, but i did promise him that i'd look for sans. i was too scared of him to ask why."** _

_"You know... he doesn't have any friends down here. All locked up. You're the only person he can talk to." he pauses, not knowing what to say next. That explains a lot of things like that one time you asked him if there were more of them down there, and he didn't answer._

_"Anyways, you're a human, right?" you nod. So much for a conversation._

_"That's hilarious." he laughs._

_"Hey, kid, don't ever come to the Underground. Under any circumstance. Sans would be devastated if we were to capture your soul, you know?"_

_You look at him with a grim look on your face, recalling when Sans lectured you on what the souls were for, and how the barrier was to be gone._

_"those are two favors! unfair." you write back._

_"Whatever. Just promise me those two things, yeah?"_

_You think for a while._

_"I promise.", encircling the phrase more than a few times, you handed it to him. You scrambled everything in your knapsack for another piece of paper and markers._

_Retrieving your items, you smile as you doodle a blue smiling face on the left of the paper. "Sans", you labeled it._

_"What're you drawing there, buddy?"_

_A red smiling face with scribbles at the top running down the side, resembling hair, was drawn on the right side."Me"._

_And then you drew a black line down the center of the paper, in between the scribble of you and Sans. It's supposed to resemble the barrier._

_You were about to hand it to Gaster, before he stopped you and mumbled,_

_"You forgot someone." Right! You quickly drew another smiling face right underneath the drawing of Sans, labeling it "Gaster"._

_You finally handed the piece of paper to him, and while he sets it down on a nearby desk that you can't see, you quickly threw on another scribble on another piece of paper._

_"sometime later:" was written at the top, showing that this was a continuation of the last picture.You drew the same smiling faces, this time, you were at the middle of Gaster and Sans, and the black line was nowhere to be seen._

_You wanted to show him that after the barrier falls, you'll make sure that the three of you still stick together. You had warmed up to him immensely after that talk, being less scared of him now._

_*** It's a poorly-drawn picture of three smiling people.** _

_Someone whispers to you. You shrug it off, suddenly getting a minor headache._

_After handing it to Gaster, you could hear him snort._

_"Hopefully I'd still be alive to be there. I'm an old man." you nodded, with a look of determination crossing your face. "Hey, it's getting dark out. You should head back soon."_

_**"i like mister Gaster. I also forgot to ask him to give back the drawings i drew for him, but it's okay. he can keep it."** _

_He was right; looking up, you noticed that through the leaves and branches of the towering trees covering the sky, above you was a sea of orange getting darker. The sun was setting._

_T_ _urning around, disappointed that you didn't get to see Sans today, you waved at Gaster and ran home._

_"I promise."  you repeated to yourself._

_**"i went home because he told me to.Maybe i can see him tomorrow."** _

  
"* that explains a lot of things. except for the fact that you thought gaster was my dad," he laughs.You do your breath-laugh and nod, realizing that you finished the cupcake, getting lost in thought as you stare at the empty plate.

"* don't worry about it, it's on the house." He dabbed the leftover icing on his finger and smudged it on your cheek.

"* no, wait, it's on you."

You punch his shoulder rather forcefully, wiping the icing off your face.

"* hey, did the old man say why you had to look for me?"You shake your head, tapping your pen in a continuous rhythm.

"* huh. figures." Sans shifts in his seat. He knows, however. Sans knows the exact reason why you had to meet again. He didn't want to tell you yet, because he's certain you’d just be unsettled by it and possibly shut him out.

He's known you for quite some time to know that himself.

The two of you sit there in silence. Comfortable silence, to which the both of you had grown accustomed to years ago. Guess nothing changed from the old days, huh?

You write something on a napkin, but you think this must have been too much of a question to ask.

"* what is it, buddy?" Sans noticed you clutching on to it. You frown, not sure what to do with it. You crumple it into a ball, something you always did to a message when you were bothered by something. You considered passing it to Sans like that, but you just set it down the opposite end of the table where he can't reach it.

You think you saw the white pinpricks of light in his eye sockets disappear for a second, but you just might be seeing things.

"* well, break's over." he grumbles, reading the clock off of his phone."* also, thanks for yesterday. helped a skele- _ton._ " You bump your head on the table, earning you a look from one of the workers. "* i'd also like you to meet some of my friends."

Friends? That's new. Sans didn't have a brother at the time you were at the mountain, so when Papyrus was with him yesterday, you were quite surprised.

But friends? That’s an entirely different level. You had figured beforehand that he wasn’t going to be trapped in his room forever, so you shake it off. He sure was busy after you left.

Your lips curl down at the thought. You wish you never had to move. Then, it wouldn't have taken you seven months to look for the damn monster. Then you would have never left his side.

"* see ya tomorrow." he winks, disappearing within the blink of an eye. You were aware of his power, but this was the first time you actually saw him do it. You didn't have a single reason to believe him back then anyways, since he never showed it to you.

Wait, how are you going to meet up with his friends? Is he going to pick you up same place, same time? You stand there for a moment, not knowing what to do, or where to go tomorrow. He oddly left that piece of information out for some reason.

You look at the table, staring at an empty plate with a fork, a pen and a few napkins with writing in them, to verify that what happened today was real and not a dream.

_Not imaginary. Not at all._

One of the napkins has a scribble caught your eye. It was Sans' doodle of a blue smiling face, a ketchup bottle and his number hastily scribbled next to it.

_Cheesy motherfucker._

You leave the bakery, not bothering to check on the crumpled napkin at the edge of the table.It had gone missing.


	3. Two Ends Meet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which both of you fall in love... with fireworks.  
> And lots of texting.
> 
> "* why don't they call it hot cats?" You silently giggle, involuntary air being forced out your throat.
> 
> "* i'm pretty mad right now. you know what? one day i'm going to sell hot cats, and i'll be the first one to. i'll be so cool." he joked, gracing the last sentence with sarcasm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm posting three chapters at once because i can

Once his shift is over, Sans teleports back to his room, like he always does. Boy, non-locomotive transportation sure is exhausting.

Carefully, he uncrumples the crumpled napkin and straightened it out.

" **Wh** y di _ **d y** ou_ forg _et ąbo_ u **t me**?" it read, a little smudged, though legible enough. Although he feels as if he's not surprised at all (* knew that question was coming,), he can't help but let out a sad sigh, very guilty with what he's done with you.

Sans puts the napkin down with the doodle you let him keep the other day.

* * *

You quickly hitch a ride home after your little 'date' with Sans. Shuffling your shoes off and heading to your room, you bring out your phone to text Sans with the number he left.

 _ **xxx-xxx-xxxx** 1:13 pm  
_ _i thought you just forgot to tell me how we'd meet up tomorrow.  
_ _then i saw your message on the table.  
_ _ffs sans a little warning next time._

 _  
_ You're not expecting him to reply any time soon, since he did mention he was still in the middle of his shift. You scurry around the things in your bag to retrieve your journal.You decide to keep the doodles in another place, as sticking them in between the pages is not that good of an idea. It could easily fall off, evident by the little incident yesterday.

You pluck them off and carefully put them in a brown envelope, feeling silly about how well you treat them. _As if they were my own children_ , your mind echoes.

Shoving your things back in your bag, you leave the house for another time, exploring the town. You'd explored the forbidden mountain when you were eight, but that was a piece of cake. The real challenge here is the city.

* * *

You get home exhausted; your muscles tense and aching. You got a little carried away in the mall and now it's 8 pm once you got back. Your phone buzzes, _1 new message._

You had put it off for climbing on to your bed. Once you got comfortable, you whip up your phone to see your friend replying to your banter 7 hours ago.

 _ **nobody knows what it's like to be the sans man** 8:23 pm  
_ _i was trying to femur creative._

 _  
_ You sit up on your bed just to gently bump it into the headboard. It's too late to be plagued by puns, this is so unfair.

Two new messages.

 _ **nobody knows what it's like to be the sans man** 8:23 pm  
_ _what did you just name me?  
_ _seriously i thought you could do better_

 _  
_ It's a new feature on the messaging app, you could see what nicknames you both had given each other on your contacts. You snort, rolling around on your bed to get a better hold of your phone.

 _ **xxx-xxx-xxxx** 8:25 pm  
_ _boo  
_ _i spent a reasonably long amount of time picking that out, sheesh_

**_((nobody knows wha... renamed you to "doo doo butt".))_ **

   
_**doo doo butt** 8:26 pm  
__WHAT THE FUCK, SANS  
__VERY MATURE_

  _ **nobody knows what it's like to be the sans man** 8:26 pm  
__it didn't even put the entire name in  
__you suck at names_

 _ **doo doo butt** 8:26 pm  
_ _says the one who named me doo doo butt  
_ _maybe you're just salty of the fact i'm making PUN of you_

  
Sans doubles over, grinning wider than he ever had in his entire life.

 _  
**nobody knows what it's like to be the sans man** 8:27 pm  
_ _snrk, whatever you say, doo doo butt  
_ _alright, let's talk business  
_ _meet me in front of the bakery at 9 am  
_ _then we'll drive to my place  
_ _4 of my other friends'll be there_

  
The sudden influx of messages startled you. How could he type so fast? And how could he type in general? Touch screens need heat and skin, isn't he just made of bones? You shake yourself out of thought, thinking monster magic must have been quite the technology.

 _  
**doo doo butt** 8:35 pm  
_ _yeah sure  
_ _What should i keep in mind about your friends?  
_ _so i don't mess this up_

 _  
_ _**nobody knows what it's like to be the sans man** 8:37 pm  
__i dunno. bring ear muffs, papyrus and one of em like it loud  
__one of them is also mute  
__uhh say no when someone asks you about anime  
__and prepare for lots of bone-crushing hugs_

 _  
_ _**doo doo butt** 8:37 pm  
__sounds intense.  
__i should also go rest up now_

 _  
_ _**nobody knows what it's like to be the sans man** 8:37 pm  
__well then.  
__night, dood_

 _  
_ You sit there for a minute, before getting startled by an explosion coming from way up the sky. You recognize that sound. A few more set off, bathing the dark sky in different colors of lights.

 _ **nobody knows what it's like to be the sans man** 8:48 pm  
_ _i thought the place was getting bombed  
_ _aren't these fireworks or something?_

  
Huh. He lives pretty close. You smile because he seems to remember the fireworks from that one time.

 _ **doo doo butt** 8:49 pm  
_ _yeah. i showed you a video of em back at the mountain.  
_ _4th of July?  
_ _remember?_

  
_**nobody knows what it's like to be the sans man** 8:49 pm  
_ _only a little  
_ _what's the occasion?_

 _  
**doo doo butt** 8:50 pm  
_ _as far as i'm concerned, it's not July 4, nor December 31  
_ _no idea_

 _  
_ _**nobody knows what it's like to be the sans man** 8:51 pm  
__eh, beats the both of us  
__so this is what it looks like up close_

Sans was staring out the window, watching the light show. Papyrus had joined him as well. They were both frightened the first few times, but now they're just in awe. Sans had told Papyrus about the little he remembers about 4th of July with you.It was like watching the stars up close. Sans felt the same foreign tug at his chest.

 _Thump_. His soul goes.

_**nobody knows what it's like to be the sans man** 9:16 pm_

_tell me about our 4th of july_

_  
_ You feel something inside you flutter, the way it read “our”. You turn into a scarlet red, rubbing at your face to get rid of it. You have an idea. You pick up your journal again, skipping to your entry for July 4. You type everything in there in one entire text, hoping Sans wouldn't mind the sudden wall of words on his phone.

_**"July 4"** _

_The second encounter._

_**"Today is the independence day of America. Sans does not know about it. i don't think any monster does, since it's a surface thing."** _

_"IT'S SPECIAL DAY TODAY! :D" You wrote, trying your best to draw colorful fireworks at the side. Sans seems confused, asking if it was your birthday._

_"No!! It's 4th of July."_

_"* and?"_

_"It's the independence day of America." you write to him, not in the mood to recount your entire history lesson._

_"* uh..." If only Sans could slip out of his room and wander around like you do and see for himself, he could tell you that around this time of the year, the garbage dump would be filled with color papers and barbeque sticks. "* what?"_

_**"I did not really tell him what it was because I was too busy feeding him hotdogs"** _

_"Never mind. we just celebrate it by lighting plenty fireworks and eating hotdogs and bbq. LOOK OUT" You pass the message to him, bringing out a huge tupperware container that contains hotdogs on sticks. You also made sure to include packets of ketchup; you didn't bring the mustard because it was quite the baggage._

_"Look! I brought you hotdogs!" was taped on the lid of the container. Sans had caught it with impressive reflexes._

_**"I wonder if monsters have hotdogs underground"** _

_"* o-oh. thanks. please tell me they're not made of dogs." he makes a face, struggling to open it. He eventually figures it out, sighing in relief.If you could, you'd be giggling mad right now._

_"No, silly!"_

_**"i don't think they do, but i wish they have them soon enough. hotdogs are the best."** _

_"* why don't they call it hot cats?" You silently giggle, involuntary air being forced out your throat._

_"* i'm pretty mad right now. you know what? one day i'm going to sell hot cats, and i'll be the first one to. i'll be so cool." he joked, gracing the last sentence with sarcasm._

_**"Today i learned that Sans is very funny and likes to make me laugh. i should show him my joke book next time."** _

_"* how do i even eat this." He holds a hotdog by the stick, poking it with his tongue. Skeletons have tongues. Okay._

_You smack yourself in the face for forgetting. He's a skeleton. He can't really eat food, it goes right through him._

_"* oh, oh. don't worry, hey! i can just fix it up with some magic doo-dads, haha." he laughs, reassuring you. You had brought them all the way over here, he doesn't like seeing your effort go to waste. He quickly shuffles away as he does his thing. You wait there, looking up as you search the sky for any fireworks._

_Nope, not yet._

_"* back. with magic hotdogs." he held them up to you, asking if you want any. You wrote that you had enough for tonight._

_He caught you staring at the sky, quietly waiting for something. He then noticed how dark it was. The sky was pitch black, barely lit by the faint, subtle glow of the moonlight._

_**"nobody noticed i was gone, so i'd have no problem sneaking back in."** _

_"* isn't it late already?" he asks, recalling from some of his surface knowledge that children are not supposed to stay out this late in the night._

_"Home doesn't mind. Busy with the celebration"_

_"* that's..." he trailed off, not knowing what to tell you. Irresponsible? Careless? He took a large bite of the hotdog, in deep thought._

_He shakes his head. They must be nice people, because of all things, you do look like you're well taken care of. And if they do turn out to be irresponsibly careless, he'd guess that he should be thankful for that because you get to sneak through the mountain to see him._

_By then, Sans had realized that he’s ridiculously selfish._

_In all honesty, he is very concerned about you, despite being the same age, he knows an awful lot of things that involve danger and... other things._

_**"Today i also learned that Sans likes to eat ketchup more than the hotdogs. i don't know why, it's really gross."** _

_He picks up a packet of ketchup, ripping it open. He doesn't really know what it's for, but he squeezed it into his mouth after fixing it up with magic._

_..._

_What a sensation._

_"* this... is the best thing i've ever tasted." he informed you, showing you the packet of ketchup before sipping more of it. You scrunch your face up in disgust, already tasting the grossness in your mouth._

_"ew. Don't eat it like that." you write. "You put it on the hotdog."_

_"* but it's too delicious!" he retorts, reading the ingredients at the back._

_Tomato. This is made of tomato._

_A surface crop._

_**"He also thanked me, for some reason. i don't know why, either. i'll ask about it tomorrow."** _

_He nearly dropped what he was eating once he realized it. He's eating clean surface food, for the first time._

_He must have been the only one to get to, too. He's been told that the only food you'll get from the surface is the garbage dump, but that's practically inedible, anyways. His eyes widen at the thought, looking at the hotdogs like he just found golden treasure._

_"* hey..." He called to you. You rip your eyes away from the sky to look at him. "* thanks. for this. for everything."_

_"you're very welcome, Sans!!" you obliviously write down at a fast pace, dropping it."the fireworks are starting soon!!"_

_**"Sans is scared of fireworks. it must be too loud for his ears. wait, do skeletons have ears? i know they have tongues, maybe they do. i should have also asked about it"** _

_"* the what?"_

_You could hear a whistle piercing through the sky, followed by a loud ‘bang’. Sans was frightened, having never experienced a firework display before._

_From his view, your face was bathed in cyan light, like you were standing in front of a light blue fire. It had disappeared before Sans could call for you to tell him what was going on._

_He can't see any of the fireworks from down there; he can only listen to the startling pops and crackles. You realize this when you look down at Sans, who was not making any effort to look above him. You suddenly had an idea. You bring out your father's video camera. He taught you how to use it earlier and had asked you to take videos of the display._

_You press record, finding a good view where the trees don't get in the frame. Your hands are quite shaky, so you hoped that Sans could still make out what was there to see when you show it to him later._

_**"He can't see the fireworks from the hole so i took a video for him. i also gave him the camera because he likes it. Sans likes high-tech things."** _

_A blue firework is set off. Once it pops, tiny sparks dragged downwards like it was showering dots of light.A white one explodes, sending tinier pops from the sparks that had blown._

_A red one appears not to far from the white, in the same caliber. Sans watches the soft glow of the atmosphere in wonder, enchanted by the lights above him._

_The rest of the display had gone smoothly, all caught on tape.You bring it down to him, with the strap dangling on your finger so you don't break it if it drops._

_You tell him to push the tiny button on the right to play the video. Your next twelve minutes were well spent as Sans got more and more excited about the pyrotechnics in the video, asking you how it works._

_He was absolutely ecstatic. You try to explain it the best you can, although he still wasn't able to understand much, he still appreciates your effort. Eventually, you had to go home. The display ends, and soon enough, your family would be looking for you._

_You tell Sans to keep the video camera, he seems very interested in the strange device. He holds it closer to his chest, giving you a strange look._

_"* isn't this your dad's?" You had gone stiff. You crumple your paper, upset, and dropped it down._

_"He won't be back for a while. work stuff, i think."_

_Sans knows how it's like, (although his isn't a father, more of a 'creator') so he decided to spare you the talk and dropped it._

_**"I went back home after the fireworks. he told me to come back tomorrow, even though he knows that i will. He’s the nicest friend i could ask for."** _

_"* ah. gotcha. really though, thanks. you give me too many things," You don't pay attention. He deserves it, being such a nice friend to you and keeping you company. You hope that this would happen more often, it was nice having him around._

_"* stay safe." he tells you, eyes starting to close halfway. You're starting to feel sleepy too. "* see ya tomorrow. or whenever."_

_You nod, tupperware and bag in hand before you continue to trek home, with the rope still serving as a convenient marker for your path_.

 

 _ **nobody knows what it's like to be the sans man** 9:24 pm  
_ _so that's where my ketchup obsession came from.  
_ _jeez kid, you've only known me for 2 days and you already gave me a sweet ass camera  
_ _i think i lost it though_

 

 _ **doo doo butt** 9:25 pm  
_ _doesn’t matter, you were nice to me :v  
_ _s'ok bro_

 

Your phone had begun vibrating half an hour after you sent the message. You had closed your eyes then, snoozing off. You panic as you search for your phone. It’s under one of the blankets; you seized it with a huff.

 

_**nobody knows wha... is calling you.** _

 

You aren't used to "talking" on the phone, not because you can't really talk per se, it's jut that nobody bothers to anymore except for your parents.

You press the green button to answer it, whispering "Hello?" into the receiver.

The phone's microphone can pick up your whispers perfectly, thanks to a kind monster that fixed it up with no charge 6 months ago, your second random encounter with a monster ever since the barrier was destroyed. It all started when you were at a ramen place, lunch interrupted when your soon-employer called you on the phone. You had forgotten to inform him of your disability when you applied for the job online. So you were left there, aggressively ‘ _yellispering_ ’ at the receiver, to no avail.

Soon enough, a nervous yellow lizard had asked to sit with you. She spoke nervously, like someone forced her to. She began to ask about your problem with your phone, and you kindly told her.

She fumbled with it, doing things with the microphone. You had trusted her a little too much, you admit. She managed to increase your microphone’s sensitivity, without bashing deafening background voices to the other end. You were so thankful that you had ordered her free food, as well as her girlfriend.

Your employer called again, and you two talked with ease. Except your speech wasn’t that good syllables jumbled up.

You never got her name, unfortunately.

"whoa, you can talk?"

"Whispering's another thing." You keep your sentences short, not wanting to strain your throat. This was how your phone calls with your parents would go, because they were too busy to text you.

"well, i just called because i was too lazy to text ya. you don't have to talk back or anything, it's fine."

Silence.

"okay, good. just text me back when i hang up.” he pauses. “i... i'm here to share a secret." There was shuffling at the end of the line.

"share me yours too, if you're up for it. i don’t know. your choice." He sounds... odd. Something must have been bothering him.

At the other line, Sans is gently tracing his phalanges on your crumpled message, hesitating on his next words.

"i picked up your crumpled message a while ago... so i'll just answer it now." _Of course he did. Of course he picked up the crumpled napkin._

"you know... a lot has happened after you left. got to the point where i gave up on myself and everybody around me." He pauses again, taking a deep breath before continuing, like it takes every fiber of his being to talk to you.

"it's easy to forget a part of your life when you don't care about it anymore." he mumbles, sadness laced his tone. He must have gone through so much. 

You bite your lip. You want to press for more, ask what he meant by that, but it seems too heavy of a subject to touch.

"what about you, doll?" he puts down his phone to hang up, but was stopped when he heard you mumble at the other end.

"what was that?"

"S-sometimes, I have a hard time belie-believing that I'm not dreaming.” you try your best to whisper back. Your speech was a little distorted, something you should expect from a mute person. It’s also tiring to exhaust air out of your throat to speak.

You look back on the weekends you spent at the clinic. Your symptoms weren't firm enough for a proper diagnosis and treatment (you hid your fabled musings well), but you were still checked in and out for counseling. If you had been a toddler, they would have let it slip. That wasn't the case.

You were ten when they found out. Ten year olds aren't supposed to have imaginary friends.

You tried to them he was real.

And they didn't believe you.

“It's hard to believe that any of this is true and will stay that way."

Sans guffawed, you had actually considered him rude for a second, laughing because he didn't believe you either. It was by then that you noticed it, his laugh slightly tainted with melancholy.

"you... you have no idea." He finally says, calming down. "look, sorry for bothering you." You take a deep breath and replied.

"It's f-"

"good night." he doesn't hear you and hangs up.

“Good night, bone boy.” you murmur, even though Sans was no longer at the end of the line.

It was proven to you that maybe having someone to relate with the dark times in life offers the strongest of bonds. Think of it like strings tied together.

Strings being the people, the knot being the qualities you share. In this case, the knot you and Sans share is the disasters of the past.

Your guiltily revolting therapy sessions… and Sans’ unspoken tragedy.

But, the impending challenge is that the rope's all ruined where the two ends meet.


	4. One Day Came

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Reader comes down with a fever.  
> And the brothers tuck them to bed. On their couch.
> 
> “YOU FORGOT SOMETHING!!”
> 
> “* hmm?”
> 
> “YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO READ THEM A BED TIME STORY.” You nearly choke on your food. You glare at Sans, trying hard to stay alive and breathing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here's the last chapter i wrote before getting my ao3 account  
> there won't be updates for the next few days :C sorry!
> 
> please don't forget to give me solid feedback, some weak spots in the chapter, so i can improve my writing!

He glances briefly at the digital clock on his night stand. 4:12 am. He drops his braincase back on his pillow, grumbling to himself.

He’s definitely not going to cope well with waking up tomorrow.

* * *

 

Any time before noon was a bit too early for Sans to rise, but he tries his best to manage.

“BROTHER, WE HAVE FRIENDS COMING OVER IN AN HOUR AND YOU HAVEN’T GOTTEN UP FROM BED!!” Papyrus looms at his open doorway, skeletal hands at his ‘hips’. “YOU HAVE TO GET READY AND PREPARE!!” He commands, stomping back down the stairs to continue working in the kitchen.

That’s what Papyrus does all day, now. Just cook interesting pasta dishes, maybe Asian cuisines if he was feeling adventurous. The culinary school he had been studying at for the past 3 months had been working him to the _bone_. In addition to that, Papyrus also believes that he will get more attention and leave a stunning impression if his cooking skills were impactful.

He spends most of his day in the kitchen, unlike Sans, who only waltz in there for three reasons: to use the sink (a rare occasion), to grab ketchup from the fridge, and to bake.

His trail of thought led him to an idea.

“* hey, paps?” he calls for his brother, sitting up from his bed.

“YES, BROTHER?” he yells back from the living room, fixing the pillows on their sofa as he waits for the preheating over.

“* can i be the cook this time?” Sans casually replied, slipping his skeletal feet into his fuzzy house slippers.

A pause.

“WHY OF COURSE, SANS! ANYTHING TO GET THOSE LAZY BONES OF YOURS UP AND MOVING.” Sans stays quiet, shuffling to the kitchen. “DO NOT FRET ABOUT PREHEATING THE OVEN. I HAD DONE IT BEFOREHAND.”

“* thanks, bro.” he smiles slightly, pulling the door of the fridge open.

He picked up this baking quirk of his, once Toriel had suggested a recipe through a door back in the Underground. It was a spinach quiche, which he brought to the be...

_Nevermind_.

He rids himself of the memory before his mind wanders somewhere else.

Baking had always relaxed him when he was stressed. Well, more or less. He used the simplest of recipes, baked in the shortest time. Sans was a simple man. He hears a familiar sound coming from the opposite side counter.

_Bzzt_.1 new message.

He simpers, knowing who would have texted him.

  
_**doo doo butt** 8:56 am_  
_just woke up._  
_but I’m omw now, so hush_

Softly crowing at your unconventional means of texting, he sets his pie inside the oven to bake. He instantaneously sends himself to the bakery like yesterday, stuffing his hands in his pockets. He walks over to the left alley of Muffet’s Bakery, leaning against the wall to rest his eyes, catching up on the little sleep he had gained.

He hears a set of footsteps- someone running- pass by him and trail off in the distance, only to return. He feels a tap on his shoulder.

It’s you, looking as dead and tired as he is. Your hair is all over the place, the weary circles around your eyes had gotten darker than yesterday.

“* well, look who came back to life.” He stifles a laugh, suppressing it with his hand. “ready to go?” he idly walks over to you. You nod, trying to catch your breath from running.

“* i lied to ya. we’re not driving today.”

The ironic part was that he was lying to you, _about_ lying to you. His initial reason for meeting up with you was to drive you over on his motorcycle- but he was _two-tired_ to do so. Man, he should really use these on you someday.

You give him a look, not really up for walking today. It seems like he wasn’t, either.

“*just hold on, will ya? it’ll be quick.” he drawls, holding out his hand. You stare at it, not really catching up. What does he want? To hold your hand? Getting impatient, Sans dives forward to pull on your wrist, your entire arm towards him, with a little too much force

A little taken aback by the action, you wrap your arms around him as he holds tighter around you. Your vision gets brighter, strong breeze blowing against you. You try hard to keep up with your surroundings, failing.

One minute, you feel your entire body contract and compress itself, like you were breathing with little air. Slight claustrophobia took over you as your entire body was slowly being squeezed and crushed by nothing in particular. You gasp for air, jerking uncontrollably.

Then the next minute, you could feel everything. Like every crevice, every inch of your skin was in contact with something. You felt like you were underwater, seeing nothing but darkness. You wrap your arms firmly around him, tears building up at the corner of your eyes for no reason at all.

It didn’t feel terrible, it was just a little overwhelming.

_Thump_. You hear as you press your face into his chest, desperately listening for the only sound you could hear in this dark, hollow void.

Then before you knew it, you felt absolutely nothing. Empty. You couldn’t feel a thing. Not able to breathe. You were afraid that somehow you’d let go of Sans, so you wrap your arms even tighter without actually feeling anything. All you could do was tense your muscles, frozen in place.

And finally, you land. Your ears ring when you crash to the ground, an unpleasant sound blocking the others. Your hands cover the side of your head before the unbearable noise subsides.

Everything had felt normal again, you could hear, feel, breath, smell, taste. You hadn’t realized that you closed your eyes halfway through the strange place. You could feel bile rising up your throat, so you quickly let go of Sans to wretch on the floor. Wherever you are.

Much to your surprise, you hadn’t puked anything yet, but you feel nauseous.

“* i-i had no idea what happened.” Sans stands next to you, staggering backwards in surprise. “* okay, i do, but i didn’t mean for it to.” Stumbling over his words, he looks over at you.

“* you okay, kiddo?” you were heaving, sweat beading down the side of your face. You nod, even if he knew you weren’t.

It seems that you’re in an entirely different place, feeling something rough on the floor. You lift your hand and bring it close to your face, noticing the odd imprint at the base of your palm. As if you’d been pressing it over a rough carpet.

You’re inside a house.

_What. The. Fuck._

‘* teleporting’s always been disorienting, that i understand. but that? it’s somethin’ else…” he trails off, breathing heavily as well. You take your time to stand up and dust yourself off, eyes scanning the place you just appeared in. You assume this is Sans’ and Papyrus’ house, as Sans wasn’t disturbed by the new environment.

_Teleport, huh?_

You could tell that this house was newly furnished- spotting boxes of cardboard neatly set at one of the corners of the room. So, you had teleported. No big deal, monster magic has its own way. That was honestly the most frightening thing you’ve experienced in your life. It’s like you’d gone into your own personal hell.

“* let’s not try that again for a while, yeah?” he chortles uneasily, gaze falling back on you. “* sorry about that.”

_*great going, me. you fucked up a second time. or was it the third?_

You close your eyes, regaining your energy easily like nothing had happened. Monster magic, as you blame if anything weird ever happens. It’s monster magic. You notice that you’d been sitting on their couch before you even knew. Wow, this place must be a home to you already.

“…YOU TO NOT USE YOUR MAGIC WHEN YOU’RE TIRED!!” you come back to Earth when you hear Papyrus from another room. He’s scolding Sans, though not hiding the obvious concern in the tone of his voice. You sense Papyrus is that sweet little brother who acts like your typical, worried mother in the household.  
  
‘Tired’, huh? You also got your fair share of sleep deprivation when you had slept rather late last night. You blame yourself for over thinking, a ‘perk’ of yours. You crane your neck to let your eyes explorebthe house. It was well-furnished, styled like a classic modern home. Something at the far wall catches your eye.

“2:45 pm” a clock had read.

Weird.

You’re positive that the two of you left the bakery at 9 am. The trip barely lasted a minute, how was that possible?

“ARE YOU FEELING WELL, NEW HUMAN?” Papyrus had sit down at the other end of the couch. You were still feeling nauseous, not entirely sure if you could carry out for the rest of the day, but you wouldn’t pass up an opportunity like this.

You nod vigorously, and tried not to vomit on their carpet. You know how much of a pain in the ass that would be.

“THAT’S GOOD! BECAUSE THE OTHERS HAVE ALREADY ARRIVED!!” his cheekbones had somehow made its way higher on his face as he tries to contain his excitement. “DON’T WORRY, SANS, I ALREADY TOOK OUT THE PIE BEFORE IT HAD BURNT,”

You stare for a little, noticing that the two brothers dress differently from one another. Papyrus wears a simple turtleneck, and some jeans, also a red, tattered scarf wrapped around his neck. He was sharply dressed, compared to his brother- who obviously did not like to dress up for guests.

He’s been wearing the same blue hoodie over a white shirt, basketball shorts and fuzzy slippers for the past three days.

You’re not surprised.

You feel a lot better now, albeit tired. Worn out, you shift into a better position on the couch.

You make a feeble attempt fighting the urge to sleep. Someone must have seen your eyes flutter, your back hunching slightly before placing a soft pillow above the armrest for you to lay on. You groan, the painful migraines coming back to haunt your poor head.

“… warm. too warm.” you hear someone say as they put a cold hand to your forehead. You couldn’t see that well, your eyes had begun watering. You feel yourself drifting away, holding on to what little strength you have left.

A blanket is placed over you as you begin to slip away from consciousness. You inhale through the pillow, the pleasant scent washing over you, bringing you comfort.  
_Perfume, sweat… and ketchup._

You listen close and hear the last, soothing sound before you fall asleep.

_Thump_.

* * *

 

You wake up with a groan. You feel better than when you had slept, but you still feel a little gross. You are running a fever. You shiver, feeling cold. Your muscles ached a little, but it seems to have hurt more than it should.

_10:05 pm_ , the same clock read.

Shit, how are you going to get home now?

“SANS! THE NEW HUMAN IS AWAKE!” Papyrus was sitting at your feet. He continues, “OUR FRIENDS HAVE ALREADY LEFT BUT WE STRONGLY BELIEVE THAT YOU STAY FOR THE NIGHT. DR. ALPHYS HAD TOLD ME YOU HAVE A FEVER!! NYOO HOO HOO!!” He sobs into his hands. You couldn’t do anything but give a reassuring smile.

You are too sick to protest against it.

Usually, you’d hate feeling like this; feeling useless, unable to control anything, a burden, you name it. But for once, you were satisfied with having someone else take care of you.

“I GOT SANS TO TREAT YOU THE WAY HE ALWAYS DOES WHEN I GET ILL!” On cue, Sans had walked in the living room with hot soup in a bowl. The savory aroma of the soup coming closer reminded you that you didn’t eat lunch nor dinner. Oddly enough, you didn’t feel hungry. You slowly, and painfully, sit up to retrieve it. You wanted to say thank you, but you feel too fatigued.

Despite having little to no appetite, you didn’t want to seem rude and unthankful for their kindness, you force a spoonful of soup in your mouth.

“MONSTER FOOD CAN CURE AND HEAL ANYTHING! SADLY, WE DON’T HAVE ANY MONSTER FOOD OF THE SOUP VARIETY, SO TORIEL RAN TO THE NEAREST STORE TO COOK YOU SOUP FOR HUMANS! IT WAS FRISK’S IDEA.” he boasts about his friends, with the most passionate smile on his face, although you didn’t catch up with the names. You take another spoon.

Sans looked like he was about to go to his room and sleep, before his brother stopped him. “YOU FORGOT SOMETHING!!”

“* hmm?”

Sans sighs in defeat. “* what should i read, then?”

You play along with Papyrus, pointing at your bag on the table in front of the couch. “Journal,” you mouth.  
Papyrus catches on easily, eyes lighting up. “OH YES! THAT’S A WONDERFUL IDEA.”

You let him search through your bag, opening your notebook as he throws you a look. “* i want to go to bed.” he jokingly mumbles to himself, purposefully picking out the shortest entry to make it quick. There’s one for September 12.

_**“September 12”** _ he began in the most monotone voice he could muster.

Two months after your encounter.

_**“I went to sans’s place after school. he wanted me to go home early but i didn’t let him have it. It was already super late.”** _

_“* you… you should go home early.” he pleads as you shake your head._

_“* you have school tomorrow,” you shake your head another time. “* wouldn’t wanna be late for that, huh?”_

_You glower at him._

_“* …right.”_

_**“I don’t like school. there are mean people there.”** _

_School was the last place that you wanted to be in your entire life._

_**“ He asked me about the surface, so i drew him a big picture.”** _

_“* tell me about the surface,” he asks, might as well keep the both of you busy if you really don’t want to leave. He lays down on the floor, eyes staring at the night sky through the hole. You gleam at him, taking a seat as well, right at the edge of the hole with your legs hanging._

_You enthusiastically draw on a large piece of paper, transferring the breath-taking view of the rural village you came from. You made sure to include your house._

_You add the night sky and the moon above, as well as the stars. You can never forget the stars._

_You connect them dot-to-dot, just as you remember the constellations. You had grown a liking to them and their origin stories quite recently, that being a main lesson in your Science class. You color in as much as you please, listening to Sans hum to himself._

_You wish you could hum along, too._

_“SURFACE” you write at the top to finish it off. You carefully drop it to Sans, not wanting it to be ruined. You look down at him as he drags one of his fingers on the night sky. He didn’t seem to pay any interest to the other elements of your drawing- he focused his attention on the stars. He looks up at the sky, seeing the same specks of lights staring back at him_

_**“i learned that sans really likes stars. i like them too.”** _

_“That’s night time. Day time looks different.” you explain to him, accidentally smudging the writing with your sweaty hand. You hate it when that happens._

_“* can you show me what the sky looks like when it’s day time?” he requests. You don’t think he’s ever seen the sun before. You happily get a blue-toned paper, drawing on clouds and the sun at the far corner. Satisfied, you pass it to him._

_“ there are lots of things that sans sees everyday in the sky but doesn’t know what it’s called. I want to change that.”_

_“* woah.” he gasps, gaping at the yellow circle. “* what’s this called again?” Oh, so he has seen it._

_“That’s called the SUN.” He keeps a mental note of that, so he can tell everybody what it is once he makes it up there. It was the brightest, most beautiful thing he’s seen through the opening leading up there._

_“* what about these?” he points at the flurry of white, cotton-like clouds crowding in the sky._

_“CLOUDS.”_

_He wants to learn more about it, feeling the aching curiosity pulsing through his SOUL. He sighs._

_“Sans likes the surface. he wants to go there but he can’t. I feel bad for him.”_

_“* this makes me want to go to the surface more.” he says, full of… what was this feeling? Full of longing. It was true, the surface had appealed to him greatly ever since you came along. He puts the papers down, still lying on the ground. “* is it nice on the surface?”_

_**“sometimes i wish that i could jump down the hole to make him feel better. He won’t let me.”** _

_A scrunched up ball of paper makes its way down the hole, dropping onto his forehead. He picks it up._

_“Sometimes.” it read._

_He doesn’t ask about it, knowing better._

_You hold up your hand to your mouth as you yawn soundlessly, growing tired._

_**“He told me to go home again, and to teach him about the stars tomorrow.”** _

_“* hey, buddy. you should really go home.” you pout, gathering your things in your bag. “* see ya tomorrow, promise.”_

_You were about to stand up and leave when Sans calls for you, making another request._

_“* tell me about the stars next time, yeah?” you feel yourself beaming at him, nodding. You wave at him and run off._

_Tonight wasn’t the first time you came home agonizingly late in the night, as school doesn’t start that early. You climb up, landing on your bed lightly. You sneakily unlock your door, (you had to lock it if you sneak out, because someone might decide to go in and find you missing.) and prepare to go have a nice night’s sleep._

_Switching on your lamp as some sort of night light, you climb on your bed after taking off your footwear._

_You were too old to be tucked in by your parents, but sometimes you wish that they still did. It helps get rid of your nightmares._

_You look out your window, mountain in view. “* see ya tomorrow.” Sans liked to say, as if he has to confirm to you that you’ll come back, everyday._

_A part of the night sky was visible._

_**“reminder: bring book about stars tomorrow.”** _

_"Good night." You whisper, barely audible and raspy. But still, you had hoped Sans would hear somehow._  
_Maybe one day, he could._

 

Sans had finished reading the short passage, closing your journal. Papyrus was at your feet, looking like he was about to sleep. Story time had lasted for 2 minutes or so, with him adding some side commentary here and there.

“SO…” Papyrus starts, rudely interrupted by his own yawn. “THAT’S HOW YOU KNEW ABOUT THE SUN. I’ve… I’VE BEEN WONDERING ABOUT THAT.”

“* yeah, bro.” he briefly reminisces the first day he came to the surface, a sunset in view. “* you should go to bed, i’ll take care of this.”

Papyrus drags himself to his room, struggling to balance himself. He sure likes being read to. It reminds you of those nights you’d read a few books so your eyes get tired enough for you to go to bed.

“* you should go back to sleep, too. it’s too late to go home anyways, and i don’t want to risk a shortcut.” he explains, more to himself than you. Before he was able to stand up and leave, you tug at his jacket’s sleeve.  
He raises a brow bone.

You tug him, urging him to go closer as you were about to whisper to him. You toss yourself on the couch to lay on your side, fully facing Sans. His face went closer to yours, barely two inches apart.

You lean to the side of his skull, where his ear would be if he had one. "Good night." you try, letting him go so he can back away. He didn’t. If anything, he got closer."* ...good night." he whispers back, feeling something glide along your face. Sans had pecked his teeth on your cheek.

Was that… a kiss?

He stumbles as he reels away from you, as shocked as you are. He shoves his shaking hands down his pockets and turns away, embarrassed. You’d never seen him so blue before. Bowing his head, he retreats to his room without a word.

You heard a loud thud coming from Sans’ bedroom, followed by a long string of curse words like a sailor just stubbed his toe.

You quietly laugh to yourself, tossing yourself to lay on your other side. Your mind was racing. You try to deny it, convincing yourself that it was friendly. Your hands rest on your cheek, still feeling the warmth of the kiss lingering there like a ghost.

  
_“… you had hoped Sans would hear somehow._  
_Maybe one day, he could.”_

Sure enough, your one day came.


	5. Befriended A Monster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we get to know reader a little more.
> 
> "You wish you could hum along, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE READ 
> 
> Trigger Warnings:  
> Slight gore, pain and domestic abuse.
> 
> Read at your own risk!
> 
> This is the chapter where SHIT HITS THE FAN
> 
> This chapter centers on Reader's life before they met Sans at the mountain.  
> Things were not too well.

_"I don't want a mute child- what are we going to do with a mute child?"_

_"Why did you stop ...?"_

_"Aphonia, caused by a bilateral disruption of the recurrent laryngeal nerve... physically incapable."_

_"I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE STUPID LEGEND, JUST GO...!"_

_"Don't you want to make us proud?"_

_"...psychogenic variant... can't adduct..."_

_"...A DISAPPOINTMENT! A waste of paper!"_

_"An unknown injury in their larynx..."_

_"A long time ago, two races ruled peacefully over the Earth: HUMANS and MONSTERS."_

**_"April 5."_ **

**_"they don't love me anymore."_ **

_aaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA_

* * *

 

Your eyes shoot open, trying hard to untangle yourself from the sheets wrapped around you. You open your mouth to try to scream, but all that comes out was a soft, long exhale. You panic as your heart beats wildly in your ears, going faster and faster until you couldn't bear it anymore.

You thrash around in your place, feeling constricted.

A hand is raised to lightly touch your cheek.

It's wet.

You sit up.

"Human! It's just a nightmare, human! It's going to be okay." A hard hand gently grips at your shoulders, soothing you. You try to regulate your breathing, now aware of what was going on.

 _4 am._ You're still in their house. You're fine. Papyrus was whelling comforting things to you, which had surprised you because his voice had gone unusually soft. You use the blanket to thoroughly wipe your face, the trembling anxiety from your nightmare still there.

You've been shaking. You don't notice this until you see that Papyrus's arms were vibrating up and down as you shiver.

"* are they calm now?" A voice coming from behind him quivers all the same. You must have woken them up. You feel sorry, wanting to burst into tears again. Papyrus nods in affirmation.

You stare at your hands, curling your fingers around the blanket as Papyrus lets go of you to cook you food. You try to tell him that he doesn't have to, you can just go home and make your own.

"NONSENSE! I WANT YOU TO FEEL BETTER, BECAUSE YOU ARE OUR FRIEND." He strikes the same pose he does all the time, although his valiant comportment wasn't as convincing since he's in his pajamas.

You look down at yourself and notice that you've been sleeping in your outside clothing. Then you look at Sans, wearing a white shirt and the same shorts. His forearms were visible, and you can't help but study it.

Radius. Ulna.

Carpal.

Metacarpal.

Phalanges.

"* you fine, buddy?" Sans shifts uneasily, making you stop your staring. You nod, lying. It's been a while since you had a nightmare, honestly, and this one really shook you.

"* wanna talk about it?" You look at him. This morning isn't filled with awkward tension, thankfully. Especially after what happened... last...night...

You nod again, not really taking his question in consideration. You just wanted to get rid of the blush taking form on your flushed face. You freeze when your brain finally registers what he asked you. You aggressively shake your head.

"* you sure?" he urges. You can't believe it. You're being dragooned into talking about a silly little nightmare with the same person who kissed your cheek last night. You really can't get over it, can you?

Your brain snaps, recollecting your memory of the nightmare. You start by stretching for your journal, all tucked neatly inside your bag. You fumble with it, thinking if this is a good idea.

"* i've had them too, you know. nightmares." he awkwardly admits to you. He wants to help you, having experienced the same thing. His bad dreams had stopped recently, though. Right after the cafe incident. He keeps convincing himself that it's just a happy little coincidence.

You open your journal, handing it to him. He looks at you in puzzlement.

The first page.

You ask Sans to read it for you. You poke it at him for about a hundred times before he obliged. He takes the other end of your blanket and places it over his lap, sharing the sheet with you. There's a certain comfort rumbling inside you when he did it. He proceeds by clearing his... throat before he begins.

_**"November 5"** _

_You were 6 years old._

_**"Today my parents told me they were proud of me."** _

_You're walking home, each of your parents' hands in yours. Skipping merrily, you hum yourself a tune. It's the song you sung on stage earlier. You pause, letting go of you mother to cough on your hand._

_**"they said I was the best singer they ever heard."** _

_A strange red substance finds its way on your palm. Your father looks away, cringing. The three of you stop in your steps, your mom shuffling everything in her purse to get you some tissue._

_"Wipe your hands," she orders. You resume your walking, a bloody tissue in your hands._

_**"we practice singing everyday. and i entered contests and won."** _

_You stand in the middle of the living room, fiddling with your fingers. You open your mouth to sing, letting out no more than a raspy voice._

_"Louder. Sing louder!" she yells at you, "When I was your age, I won bigger medals than you!"_

_Tears pool at the corner of your eyes, feeling your throat burn. You shut your mouth, trying to hold yourself together as the unbearable pain distracts you from singing. You don't want to do this anymore._

_**"at night i get really bad coughs."** _

_You've been coughing non-stop last night. Your pillow case was covered with splatters of your blood. Your mother pecks you on the forehead as she leaves the room, carrying your pillowcase to put it in the laundry._

_"I love you," she whispers, before leaving the room._

_**"My throat hurts. i tried telling mom how much it hurts but she keeps saying it's normal."** _

_"That's how it is, honey." She places her arm around you. The both of you were sitting on the couch, watching TV like it was a normal day._

_You were taking a week off of singing to gain some rest and recover your voice, but it seems to get worse everyday. When you talk, it no longer sounds like you. It sounds weak and scratchy. You don't talk anymore so she doesn't notice._

_**"singing is hard."** _

_After your week off was over, your mother had signed you up for another contest with little time to practise._

_You can still make sounds, but it hurts to speak. Your throat was burning with a pain worse than before. You struggle to breathe just standing there._

_You stand on the stage, not saying a word. The judges were more confused than ever as your mother drags you off the stage to go home._

_"Why did you stop all of a sudden? Why won't you sing?!" Your mother throws the remote at you. You choke on your sobs, not knowing what you were supposed to do._

_"I-I can't!" You try to tell her, but she can't understand your hoarse voice._

_**"I don't want to sing anymore."** _

"* h-hey, do you want me to stop?" he stops reading once he noticed the tears rolling down your face. You sniff and cough, telling him 'yes'.

"* this is what it's about, huh?" he shuts the journal, handing it back to you. Your hands run over the leather cover, picking at the spots where the leather peels off.

"Part of it." you write. This was part of the reason you'd gone mute, but there were more things that really brought you down to home. You think Sans deserves to know, but you're not fully ready yet.

"I MADE CLASSIC SPAGHETTI TO CHEER YOU UP!!" He brings a steaming plate of spaghetti to the table. It smells divine, you could just dig into it. Ironically, you pick at it, 4 am not being your ideal time for breakfast.

"Thanks, Paps!" You draw a fork at the bottom. You pass it to him, and as he reads it, you could see his eyes turn into glittery stars. He looks so adorable.

As the three of you eat on the couch, you feel someone staring holes at the side of your head. You could easily tell that it's Sans. You finish your plate, and stand up to bring it to their sink. You just assume that the kitchen is where Papyrus disappears to most of the time, since he likes cooking so much.

As you leave, you catch a glimpse of him. His eye holes were eerily empty, though you manage to tell that he's staring at a piece of paper pinned in between your journal. It had almost slipped out while he was reading.

You turn the faucet on, filling your plate with water. Someone else came inside, walking right next to you. As you predicted, it's your favorite bone boy, Sans. He grabs a sponge and dips it in dish washing soap.

"* stay here for a second." he tells you as he washes the dishes. "* what's aphonia?"

He looks at you as you make hand gestures. You drag a cross (an "x") over your throat. A malfunction in the larynx.

"* and you got it because you strained your voice?" he tries his best not to hit directly on the touchy subjects, cleaning out a large pot.

You think for a bit, pursing your lips. You shake your head.

You find a convenient erasable marker that's magnet to a fridge door. You write on their refrigerator, penmanship getting sloppy.

"I should go home."

"* at 5 in the morning?" Sans stops washing the dishes to stare at you in bewilderment, like you've grown two heads. He's got a point.

"Touché. I'll stay until nine."

You walk back to the living room to find it empty. The paper sticking out of your journal is missing.

You know, it's weird. It's weird that reading off of the journal has become a day-to-day basis, thanks to Sans. You've been trying to get him to remember his past life with the help of your ancient scribbles.

Your thoughts wander to your journal.

You've kept it secret for so long. This notebook was extremely significant, and you would have gone crazy if you were to lose it. The pages inside were slowly coming off out of age.

A large part of your life, documented in a small, black leather journal.

You laugh.

It's not as funny as you thought it was, now that you think about it.

* * *

 

Sans and Papyrus did a good job on making you forget your nightmare, it seems. You can recall a part of it, remembering when your father told you about the mountain.

_"A long time ago, two races ruled peacefully over the Earth: HUMANS and MONSTERS." your father cooed, telling you about the distant mountain past your backyard. "This is where they live."he points at the green hill, covered in tall trees._

_"You want to meet them, don't you?" he says as he unlocks the fence gate of your backyard with a key. What is he doing? Aren't you supposed to stay away from it? "Feel free."_

_He says no more, walking back inside the house._

_You can't help but dare yourself._

That was extremely odd of him, now that you think about it. When you were a kid, you didn't really question his strange motive. You were still suspicious of it, so you ditched the fence gate and sneaked out through your window.

_Just in case he was testing you._

But it seemed like he didn't mind when he caught you wandering off. He just looks bothered every time you find your way back...

_Like he was trying to get rid of you?_

This confuses you. You were ripped away from your dark reverie when Papyrus comes out, dressed to the nines. He walks past you without saying anything, exiting the house joyously. That was... something else.

"* he's on a date. don't ask me about it." he warns you, grumbling.

"Aw, you're like one of those stereotypical fathers who tells boys to back off from his daughter." you tease, giving the message with a little flutter.

"* pretty much."

You laugh at him for a little. You never really got to experience that with your father. Nor were you dating anybody. You decide to direct the conversation topic to something else.

"I want you to promise me something." he tenses, a bead of sweat running down his skull. "I know you hate making promises but please trust me." you write, a distant memory with him clouding your thoughts.

"Promise me that there'll be no more secrets." you add. "Same goes for me."

He appears to be in deep thought, making a decision. He's very upfront when keeping promises. He means it when he makes one, so he's never too careful. You hold up your little finger, feeling doltish about an infantile act. He looks at it, baffled. He doesn't know what he's supposed to do.

"Pinky promise. You lock your fingers to seal it." you write to him, holding your finger back up. You grasp his hand and wrapped your pinky around his. There was a soft buzz, a hum coming from it. His hand was oddly warm, too.

"*...promise."

You stay like that for a minute, on the couch and your fingers locked together. Without thinking, you press your lips in between his eye sockets, right above where his nose would be. You giggle as he turns into a glowing blueberry.

You let go to write "Payback for last night >:F".

The both of you were interrupted by the chime of an old clock. _7 am._ Time sure flies quickly.

"* you should have this back." he places a piece of paper on your hand, the one he snatched from your journal earlier. You open it to see your diagnosis paper. It had all your information on it, from when you were 6.

" _Aphonia_." the diagnosis read. You fold it back.

"* no more secrets." Sans echoed your words.

"* you know, as much as i'd like to relearn my childhood days..." He looks away, bringing one of his hands at the back of his neck before continuing, "* i'd like to get to know you better, too."

_"* you're a great person." You peer over the edge of the hole to look at him through your tears. He was holding on to all those pictures you drew for him for the past 4 months._

_"* when someone says otherwise- they're a filthy liar."_

You sigh, explaining to him what had happened before you met him.

"My parents were not good parents. They loved me, sure, but they never considered my limit." you write, trying hard not to shake out of nervousness. You take a deep breath, before handing him the journal. He's about to continue reading where he left off when you tell him to skip it. The rest of that doesn't really matter. The real shocker was what you wrote after it.

"* alright." He flips the page.

**_"December 2"_ **

**_"Christmas is coming soon! i hope santa brings me something this year"_ **

_You look out the car window, the surroundings flushed with white snow. This used to be your most favorite time of the year. Now it's just joining choir competitions and singing Christmas carols. This year, however, that was not the case._ _Your mother glares at you from the driver's seat._

_"Don't you want to make us proud?" She asks you, clenching tighter on the steering wheel._

**_"but i don't think he will because i wasn't nice to my parents this year."_ **

_"Because of your dumb voice, we won't get to win anything this year." You know she doesn't mean it. She loves you very much and just says that when she's angry. "What do you have to say for yourself?"_

_"Sorry." You write on a piece of paper and put it on the dashboard. You could still talk a little, but it really hurts doing so._

**_"yesterday was scary."_ **

_"In a second, dear! Let me get your story book." Your mother chimes. You climb on your bed, getting excited to be read to, even though she stopped doing it when you were four. She's been acting silly lately._

**_"Mom got angry at me because I couldn't sing that well. i sounded funny."_ **

_"There was once a child who sang like an angel," She began. "and made mommy very proud." She takes a sip from a large bottle. You had wanted to taste it, but she told you that only adults drink it._

_"But mommy was a failure! Oh, poor mommy." She wasn't reading off of a book, she was making this up on her own. You know what she was talking about. You tell her it's enough, but she continues._

_"She hurt her angel's voice. And now her child can't sing." She laughs horridly, makeup smearing off of her face._ _She spits, black tears under her eyes._

_"_ _Mommy hates herself! Because it's all her fault."_

_"Isn't it, sweetie? Don't think that I didn't read that stupid diary of yours."_

**_"she hurt me by squeezing my throat."_ **

_"Mommy will make it feel better,"_ _She jumps on your bed to strangle you by your neck._

_"_ _This will only hurt a little bit. This is how I say sorry to you for hurting your voice."_ _She chokes you as you struggle to breathe. You try to scream but you couldn't. Your throat grew warm, burning like it was being torn open._

**_"she said that it will cure my funny voice and it will get back to normal."_ **

_"Watch as mommy shows you how to cure a sore throat!" She slurs, completely out of her mind. Your throat stings. You swear your neck could've been bleeding right now._

_"It'll get better!" You struggle as you try to push her off of you, but you were too weak. You start to run out of air._

**_"she also smelled funny, i think she forgot to take a bath."_ **

_She lets go, using a free hand to drink more from the bottle. You haven't seen her around it before, and it smells really odd. Like raisins, old raisins._

_She caresses your face with another hand, shushing you as you try to whimper. Nothing is coming out._

_"Now, doesn't that feel better?" You shake your head, hot tears mwlting off your face as she gets off of you. She leaves your room stumbling._

**_"it really hurt when she tried to cure me, it wasn't working. i told her to stop because it was getting really bad."_ **

_You hacked out a red oozing liquid, recognizing it as blood. It was more blood than you ever had to cough out, so you panic. You were extremely shaken by your incident with your mother._

_You call for your dad, hoping that he helps you._

_Nothing comes out. Just air. You choke slightly on blood as you try to scream. You couldn't breathe anymore, something was blocking the airway. You try to scream louder, still feeling a slight vibration in your throat._

_Snap._

**_"dad took me to the hospital."_ **

Sans was trembling as he read it. He kept asking you if he should continue, and you tell him to go on. He deserves to know. You deserve to have somebody by your side. You deserve your peace, once and for all.

You feel terrible when you spot a glistening tear roll down his face. He silently puts the journal down, slowly regretting how he brought this up.

_"* i've never met anybody stronger than you." He says, grinning up at you. You wipe your tears away. Sans is a good friend._

You start to regret it too, seeing the state he's in. But, you realize that it doesn't matter now, because you're happy where you ended up.

"* you didn't deserve that." he tells you, cold edging his voice. "* you didn't deserve any of that."

You grab a piece of paper. "It's funny, because it's worth it. In the end, I still got to befriend a monster."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm accepting prompts of the journal entry/flashback parts!
> 
> Did I do a good job? I feel like I did poorly on some parts :C
> 
> Well, we're done with the part of reader's mother.
> 
> I wonder what's with their dad?
> 
> Tumblr:  
> http://forgive-to-forget-sansfic.tumblr.com


	6. Tell Bad Jokes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which you finally meet the adorable Alphyne couple.  
> And you should've listened to the weather forecast.
> 
> It's Raining Somewhere Else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by one of Sans' leitmotifs, "It's Raining Somewhere Else".
> 
> The last chapter really stressed me out for some reason, so I had to cool things down a little bit and give you some Little Sans.

_9 am._ You eventually pack up your things, ready to get home. Unfortunately, the brothers live in an unfamiliar part of town- a monster neighborhood, so you had Sans to walk you home. You were about to twist the doorknob when somebody beats you to it. The door swings unexpectedly, knocking you down with your ass on the floor.

Ouch.

“Hey, Papyrus! Alphys forgot her…” The familiar voice of a strong woman cuts off when she sees you on the floor.

 “Oh. Oh my god.” A blue monster of the fish variety, with flaming red hair, helps you up to your feet.  “Fuck, let me help you up! Sorry about that.” She apologizes sheepishly, not recognizing you. You know those yellow teeth and leather jacket all too well.

It’s her, isn’t she. The two of you look directly into each other’s eyes, knowing exactly who you’re looking at.

“BABE!” She screams, like she usually does when she’s excited. She looks like she’s about to explode. “YOU’RE GONNA WANT TO SEE THIS!”

Sans watches the scenes unfold in amusement, not daring to interrupt your awkward hand gestures and Undyne’s enthusiastic yelling. Poor Alphys is helplessly locked under Undyne’s arm. They were talking about… microphone sensitivity? Whatever, Sans doesn't care. All he managed to read from this situation is that they met you before, in a Ramen place.

“W-well, I’m glad that it works well…” Alphys looked at the floor, threading her fingers around the hem of her shirt.

“OF COURSE IT WORKED! My girlfriend is smart, isn’t she?!”

You grin, absolutely enamored by the adorableness of the couple. You know how the saying goes, 'opposites attract'!

“Ah! We forgot our names. This is Alphys, and I’m Undyne.” She shakes your hand with the grip of a baseball player. You rub at it once she lets go, trying to soothe the pain. “We were wondering why you’re at the bonehead’s house,”

“Wanted to meet you guys. Came down with a fever.” You write. So, this is Dr. Alphys, huh? You were about to thank her for last night when Sans decides that it's a good time to drag you away.

“* c’mon, guys. she wants to go home.” Sans backs you up when he catches you sweating bullets. You were just extremely intimidated at the sculptured woman. You give the Heavens a silent ‘thank you’ as Alphys shuffles inside for the jacket she left here last night. You weren't thinking rudely, you just think that you had your fair share of unexpected events for the past few days. You're going to wind down.

“So… you stayed the night, huh?” Undyne smirks at you, a suggestive tone in her voice. Her eyes dart between you and Sans, making your ears flush red in embarrassment. She guffaws at you, slapping her knee as Alphys goes back to the front door.

“Th-thanks for letting me in!”

“* no problem, alphy.”

Undyne shakes your hand for the last time before they leave, slapping something on to your palm. The front door closes as you look at what Undyne gave you.

It’s a slip of paper with “i ship it.” with a phone number at the bottom. You feel a little déjà vu crawl up at the base of your neck. Huh. Is this a custom when monsters share phone number digits?

“* what’s that?” You jump in surprise, crumpling it in your fist out of habit. You shake your head, dismissing him as you stuff it in your pocket. You’ve been doing a good job at hiding your blushing from him. You deserve a pat on the back.

“* whale, whale, whale.” Fucking hell, he has a pun for everything. “* you’re breaking the entire no-secrets ordeal but i’ll let it slide.” he throws a smug look on his face. You’ve also been feeling bubblier ever since you opened up to Sans. It helped to get it off of your chest- you’ve been hiding it for so long. Most people just assume you were born with it, or something.

After all, Sans is the only one who knows- and the only one you can trust. You’ve known him your entire life.

“* we’re not teleporting or anything, so prepare your legs for the most intense workout i’m assuming you’ve had your entire life.” Sans chuckles, “* or maybe i’m just talking about myself?”

The both of you shift out of the house, Sans locking the door. He wasn’t lying when he said that you’re going to meet an unfamiliar neighborhood.

“How far is it from here?” You’ve also kept a mental note to fix your punctuation and capitalization because you’ve just discovered how annoying it is to read it if it’s all wrong. Sans notices this, but doesn’t mention it.

“* where do you live?” he asks you.

Right. You write down your address without hesitation. His smile twitches a little bit, the white dots of his eyes dilating.

“* you live _that_ far from the café?” he says, in complete, utter disbelief. It's like, 20 blocks away or something.

“It’s the only one that accepts monsters.” you retort.

“* …that really warms my imaginary heart, kiddo.” He softens and begins to walk along the sidewalk. As you stroll down the street, you take your time to study each monster living their everyday lives. You spot a dog walking a …dog? Now that you look around, there are not many monsters outside. You quickly avert your gaze once you realize that it must be rude to stare.

“* we have to take a bus. don’t wanna walk all the way there, ya dig?” You nod, looking ahead of you to spot a bus stop across the street.

…

This is the moment where you wish you watched the weather forecast before leaving. The sky was crowded with dark clouds before you even notice. The sky rumbles with thunder right before you even get near the street you were about to cross.

_Pitter, patter._

Drops of rain begin to fall from the sky. _Fuck._

Lucky you, you had packed up a convenient foldable umbrella inside your bag. You pull him by the wrist to guide two of you under a parasol of a nearby shop, getting slightly soaked in the rain. You try to open your bag to retrieve your sweet, holy umbrella without your things inside getting wet.

“*dang, i wish i brought a parasol.” Sans eyes what the two of you had been hiding under, “* i was getting a nasty burn from all this sun.” He says it to himself like an inside joke, but you laugh with him anyways. 

You finally get your umbrella and swiftly open it for the two of you to safely stoop under to avoid the rain. Sans keeps his hands inside his pockets while you hold it up. You cross the street with minor difficulty, finally sheltered by the bus stop’s roof over your heads. Only the two of you were there.

“* we’re just in time.”

A large bus pulls over, opening its doors with a soft “kshhhhhhh”.  You smile at the driver once you get inside, not because you wanted to be polite and pitiful to monsters know. He smiled at you first. Only a quarter of the bus was filled with people, human and monster species alike. The two of you sit beside each other somewhere close to the back.

“* fuck yes.” Sans groans as he sits down, “* a seat. i am blessed.” You roll your eyes as you stare out the bus window, studying the gloomy environment of the neighborhood. It isn’t just gloomy, though… it holds a sense of tranquility that very little human neighborhoods offer. It oddly feels like home.

“* we should read to pass the time?” he suggests. You don’t even have to be told, you were already in the middle of getting it from your bag. You decide to pick out something happy because of earlier events.

The two of you are record breakers. Reading 3 journal entries in one day, wow.

“*you’re not asking me to read again, are ya?”

Poke.

“* fine, but just because you asked for it, sweetheart.”

**_“March 9”_ **

_It’s been 8 months since you met him. You’ve gotten to know each other really well._

**_“It was raining today. i brought an umbrella to protect me.”_ **

_Oddly enough, in the long time you’ve snuck out to see Sans, this was the first time you’ve gone out in a rainy day. Winter was another story- it was fun when you hung out with him and got the advantage to drop snow bombs down the hole. But a rainy day?_

_It was less fun, you had to admit._

**_“i also brought another umbrella just in case sans needs it”_ **

_You brought two umbrellas with you. You found them lying around in the pantry, deciding that they were of good use. You weren’t going to give up on today because of a little rain, pshh._

_Sans had told you once that blue was his favorite color, so obviously, being the nice friend that you are- you’re going to give him the blue one. The other umbrella was in a less-provoking shade of red, suited for you. You hold it up merrily as you skip your way through the mountain, the yellow rope now barely visible ever since the snow came up._

_Luckily, you had already memorized the path. You don’t need that rope anymore._

**_“Sans says he doesn’t really know how the rain works, so i told him what i learned in science class, like how water goes up and water goes down”_ **

_You make a desperate attempt at drawing with having the handle of the umbrella pinned between your arm and your side. You draw the ocean, the sky, and rainclouds. Next- you drew on the arrows._

_You weren’t going to give him without an explanation of course, so, on a separate sheet of paper, you write what each of the arrows mean._

_It’s just like your school work. Sans had to tilt his umbrella and move directly under yours in order to get your papers without them getting ruined. He examines it carefully, dwelling on this new piece of information._

**_“they don’t have oceans or seas underground, but he said that there was something like rain down there.”_ **

_“* what’s this? ocean?” you nod your head._

_“Big sea.” you explain to him, accidentally getting the paper wet just a little bit. “Body of water that’s really big.” You add with another piece of paper._

_“* mhmm, i’ve heard about it. we don’t have any of that here, i don’t think so. just lakes and stuff.” You furrow your eyebrows._

_Maybe the Underground isn’t as big as you think it is._

**_“he told me bad jokes and i laugh, even if i didn’t understand some of them.”_ **

_“* when does it rain money?” he reads off of a joke book out of the blue. “* when there is change in the weather!”_

_The two of you laugh. You almost let go of your umbrella from doubling over. Sans flips a page, picking out a good one._

_“* what do you call when it rains chickens and ducks?” he pauses for effect, nearly selling it away by snorting. He didn’t need any response to go any further. “* foul weather.”_

_You laugh to the point where you cough, feeling extremely lively and exuberant. Sans reads you more, when he eventually ran out of jokes that were about rain._

_“*they’re so terrible, it’s funny.” he says, and you agree._

**_“When i told him the trombone joke, sans was laughing so hard that it made me laugh too.  
He says hes going to learn trombone from now on because of it”_ **

_“What is the skeleton’s favorite instrument?” you write in red pen, suddenly feeling cold. You wrap your yellow raincoat tighter against you, hoping that you don’t get a cold._

_“* what? a xylobone?” Sans tries to beat you to the punch line (a competition the two of you had come up with) but fails horribly._

_“No! A trombone!”_

_Sans is howling. He throws the joke book away, jesting you that he doesn’t need it anymore._

_“* heheh…” he was still laughing, suddenly growing an interest in bone puns, “* i’m not kidding- i actually want to play trombone now. pfft- stop laughing! i’m serious, i’m going to play trombone, when i grow up.”_

**_“I hope i get to hear him play it someday”_ **

_“* i won’t dedicate myself to it, though. i’d just play it to tell your joke.”_

**_“Sans did most of the talking, since it was hard to write in the rain without it getting wet.”_ **

_Silence._

_You sit there for a while, listening to the shower and the slight roll of thunder above you. Sans breaks the silence by talking about the water cycle you taught him earlier._

_“* it’s really cool.” You bow down your head to take a look at Sans, but you could only see the top of his blue umbrella.  “* how it rains on the surface all the time.”_

_You shift in your place, feeling curious. Sans was having one of his rambles again, and you couldn’t help but listen. He always talks about interesting things, about what’s been plaguing his mind recently._

**_“he was rambling again, about the water cycle.”_ **

_“* you know, how no matter where we are or what time it is, it’s always raining, whether it be here, or somewhere else.”_

_You chew it over. You see the top of his umbrella spin, like he’s playing with it. You do the same, watching raindrops fall of the edge of it. He continues his musing._

_“* because somehow, you’ve gotta keep the water cycle going, right? so there’s no doubt that it’s always raining on some part of the world every day.”_

**_“He was talking about how it’s always raining. i wonder if it’s really true.”_ **

_You sneeze, earning Sans’ attention. The downpour is getting louder now; it’s practically impossible not to get wet from it even if you’re hiding under an umbrella_

_“* hey, buddy.” Sans calls you, raising his voice. “* it’s time to go home.”_

_You nod, not wanting to get sick again and miss tomorrow. You halt before you leave, waiting for that one thing he always says._

_“* come back tomorrow.” It was either that or “see you tomorrow”._

_“I will.” you whisper to yourself. You forget about the blue umbrella and start walking back home._

**_“I went home because it was raining harder. i wish tomorrow it doesn’t rain that much.”_ **

‘*well, that’s it for the day. we're reading too many off of this journal entry. to be frank, i don't want the stories to run out, heh.” Sans breathes out as he closes the notebook. He looks at you to see you gaze directed out the window, the corners of your lips tugging up. “* hey, do you still remember what i was rambling about?”

You’re too lazy to move, so you just made eye contact through the reflection in the window. You think it’s silly; Sans thinks it’s genius.

“I think you were talking about how it’s always raining on the surface, on some part of the world, for every time of the day.” You pass it to him, still facing the window. You could recognize the path you always took from your house to the café.

“* hmm. guess little me was really smart, huh?”

You nod.

“Did you know that it took me 2 years to actually understand what you meant by that?”

He laughs, cheekbones tinting blue. You watch pedestrians cross the street. You could see children playing in the rain, a monster and a human. The monster is a yellow armless lizard, with a striped raincoat on. They remind you of Alphys.

Your hand ghosts right about your pocket.

“* our stop is up ahead.”

* * *

 

You swing your door open, pleased with the sudden familiarity of the environment. Home sweet home.

“You’re not going to walk in the rain, are you?” you try to look as displeased as you can be. The least you can do is to offer him your umbrella for the second time in your life, but he ignores you.

“* of course not. who wants to walk, when you’ve got a shortcut?”

“I thought you’re trying to avoid teleporting?”

“* only when i’m taking you with me.” he winks, and disappears with a sudden growl coming from the magic. A slanted, black hole was ripped up out of nowhere, disappearing within a few seconds. Fuck Sans, trying to make you flustered.

Now that he’s not around you, you let your inner fury out as your face turns into a dark shade of scarlet. Is this really happening? Have the gods and goddesses finally took mercy on your poor face and have someone continuously flirt with you every day?

Nope. You don’t want to think about it.

Just let it all happen on its own. Besides, you have graver things to worry about.

 _Bzzt._ 1 new message. Your phone vibrates inside your bag, thankfully not getting wet in the light storm earlier

 **nobody knows what it’s like to be the sans man** 12:34 pm  
i got home in time  
except the void almost tried to eat me wow

 **doo doo butt** 12:36 pm  
I’m assuming that the void is that painful thing i went through while teleporting with you

 **nobody knows what it’s like to be the sans man** 12:36 pm  
yeah, pretty much  
except it’s not that painful

 **doo doo butt** 12:38 pm  
Well, just be careful next time, yeah?

 **nobody knows what it’s like to be the sans man** 12:38 pm  
whatever, granny.  
hey, is it raining over there?

You pull back your curtains, seeing droplets dotting all over your window. You see that the easy drizzle has stopped, nothing falling from the sky. Dark clouds slowly thin away.

Huh. Guess the rain was just passing by.

 **doo doo butt** 12:40 pm  
Nah  
It’s raining somewhere else

You put your phone down, heading to the bathroom to clean up. Stripping off your clothes, you crank up the heater and let the steaming hot water roll off your back. Your mind reluctantly wanders off to prod at a distant memory. One that consists of a rainy day where you tell bad jokes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise that there'll be more of the other characters soon! Sorry it sort of sucks, I was having a hard time figuring out how to write them.
> 
> So far, this is one of my favorite chapters to write because it was completely off the bat and it really helped on getting rid of my bad mood xD
> 
> What do you guys think?
> 
> PS. 100 KUDOS THIS IS INSANE! The support and feedback you guys have been giving me really helped <3 I wouldn't have written this far without your helpful comments and supplying me DETERMINATION :D

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know what you think!  
> Also, I'm accepting prompts! Let me know if you have an idea for one of reader's childhood memories with Sans. Or anything.
> 
> Tumblr for updates, shenanigans and whatnot:  
> http://forgive-to-forget-sansfic.tumblr.com


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